Long Time Gone

“ Been a long time gone, no I ain't hoed a row since I don't know when”

I’ve never actually hoed a row or rode … (good time to stop that thought) – but I have been gone from this fair city for a good while. While I’m overjoyed to be back in Sydney town with Kel and the city has dolled itself up and put on a good smile for us it still has taken some retribution for my lack of attention to it over the past ten years.

Case in point #1:
Having packed all our worldly possessions in a 20 ft container and jumping a plane with a single suitcase I thought I had a slight reprieve because I still had some clothing here in Sydney. 10 years is a long time and you know you get a bit lazy, eat a few too many Dick’s Deluxes and those old pants and your favourite Speedo don’t hide as much as they used to. Just in case denial got the better of me Kelly has taken the initiative and cut up most of my old getups telling me that she is going to make a quilt out of them – which is a nice way for her to tell me that she would rather stay in and watch cricket on the tele than go out in public with me wearing those old clothes.

Case in point #2:
Not too many things are tougher on a bloke than the voice that wafts over from the passenger seat from your fiancée (sub: wife/girlfriend) telling you that you need to go this way or you are going the wrong way. When you grew up in a city and your S.O. has been here for all of two mins. taking those directions is even harder. So when Kelly tells me I am trying to cross the Harbour Bridge in a lane that is reserved for “electronic tag” holders I laughed her off knowing there was no such thing – WRONG and that will be $80 to the state govt. thank you. Sorry Kel.

Case in point #3:
No silly little stories to tell in illustrating this point – but if this is retribution for leaving I may never leave the County of Cumberland again for fear of what might happen. On one of our little jaunts around the city I went to show Kelly my favourite pub – The Harold Park Hotel – well it used to be Harold in any case, it’s now a vegetarian restaurant with a housing development above it. It was there for 100 odd years, I duck out for a couple of years and they do this - R.I.P. Harold.

We live in a land down under where women glow and men thunder.

Cheers.